Today is the day that I make my yearly pilgrimage to Hell. Yes, it’s time for Christmas shopping at my local mall once again. Do I enjoy it: obviously not, but it is something I need to do. So (as usual) I take a shot of Jack Daniels, pop a top on a nice cold Guinness, pick up the phone, and call my friends to see what they want for Christmas. Here were some of their responses…
Wonder Woman – A more powerful weapon. “A Lasso of Truth? Seriously?!”
Aquaman – Respect. “I’m in the Justice League, people!”
The Mandarin – To be the main villain in the next Iron Man film. “So that I can kill Trevor Slattery for making a mockery of me.”
Hawkeye – His own TV show. “I can do everything Oliver Queen can do!”
Hulk – A time machine. “So I can go back in time and NOT save Rick Jones.”
M.O.D.O.K. – A flat screen TV. “This old box look is so outdated…”
Thanos – A matching Infinity Gauntlet. “It’s 2013, not 1982!”
I think that I can get all of these things at the local mall. This should be a fast trip and not so expensive. UGH. Well for me all I want for Christmas is world peace, an end to hunger, and no more crime. Yeah right! What I really want for Christmas is for 20th Century Fox and Warner Bros. to man-up, come to an agreement, and release the original Batman TV series to DVD so that I can buy it and free-up a lot of space on my DVR.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!