A Geeks With Wives Christmas Story

T’was the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not an enemy was stirring, because the clicks of my mouse.
My weapons were slung over my shoulder with care,
While walking through Kyrat with friends on Multiplayer.

My children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While on Destiny I’m shooting off many alien heads.
And my wife sitting next to me playing her 3DS,
We just knew that this winter would be one of the best.

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When out on our porch arose such a clatter,
My GCW Zero had arrived which couldn’t be radder.
I signed for it and opened it in a flash,
I played Zelda for a while breaking every pot for cash.

When I needed a break from gaming but didn’t want to nap,
I checked Geeks With Wives for a comic recap.
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
That the new Dynamite entertainment comics were here!

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So I got my Lenovo tablet and brought up ComicsFix,
“Hot damn this is better than two Saint Nicks!”
I read and read to my heart’s content,
I even brought out physical comics and my iPhone got bent.

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I read Spider-man, now Batman, Ninja Turtles and Thor!
On to Saga, to Injustice, to Axis and More!
To the best from IDW and Image and Boom,
By the time I was done reading, my comics covered the room.

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My wife fired up the Wii U and gave me a stare,
She said “I challenge you to Smash Bros., so face me if you dare!”
I grabbed my controller and chose Pikachu,
But with her skills playing Fox, I knew I was through.

So after I weathered a painful defeat,
I decided I needed to take to the street.
The first person GTA mode felt so real,
It’s so relaxing when there’s so many cars to steal.

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And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof,
Some dubstep and bass drops followed by a “poof!”.
As we drew our heads, and were turning around,
Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.

But he didn’t look like St. Nick, he was Santa Deadpool!
“Whoa Santa’s a Cosplayer! That’s pretty cool!”
We asked if he would get into character, and he knew what we meant,
Before we took our picture with him we asked for consent.

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He got into character, and went straight to work,
And filled all of the stockings, and turned into a jerk.
“Ho ho frickin’ ho kids, bring the eggnog in,
I’m hopping on your PC, what’s your World of Warcraft log in?”

After Santa Deadpool, did dailies in his garrison,
When he decided to leave and it was really embarrassing.
He couldn’t get back up the chimney, because he was drunk,
So he left through the front door and climbed a tree trunk.

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He got back up in his sleigh, and fired back up the music,
His sleight wobbled and teetered but he did well to not lose it.
But I heard him say as he begun to fly out of sight,
“Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!”

Happy Holidays from the Geeks With Wives Crew!

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